madness!

Have you purchased your World Cup Etnies yet? No? Good. Don’t give into the delirium.

Although most may want to shoot me, I am completely sick of having my laptop infiltrated with World Cup news. Honestly, I don't care. I have more respect for the sport than "American Football" where men want an excuse to touch each other, but this is not the news I want to hear. I am not a very big sports fan, and my mom is most certainly NOT a sports fan. Though on the first day of the World Cup she calls to tell me she can't change the channel because she is so engrossed in it. Bah! The world has gone crazy! Run for the edge! Oh wait, it's round. Dammit. Ooo, sorry, that was lame.

The World Cup craze smells strangely like the die hard American Football fans. You know what I’m talking about. The guys that cry when their team loses a game. These Football/Soccer fans have drool running out of their mouths, and glazed eyes from not blinking for hours, as they sit glued to the television. The only good I can find is the fact they are drinking beer. Don’t they have jobs?

Well listen here Johnny World Cup, I am making fun of you. Yep. That’s right. Check out some of the insane photos that I didn’t even have to use Google to find.





"Look how cool I am! My skull looks just like a soccer ball!"



Urinals with soccer goals. I wonder if you get a prize if you can aim into the goal with your pee?



A soccer ball eye ball! Fantastic, I bet Marilyn Manson would wear those. Heh heh heh. Funnnnnnnnny.

soul searching

Fellow friend and blogger Mar-Bear has posed a very deep question on her blog. I feel that we all need to take some time to ponder and then answer. Now remember there are only two possible choices for your answer. Be wise my friends!

click click

chiggas wanna know: round deux.

So last time you all (well like 5 or 6 of you) decided on Neko Case over Jenny Lewis. Sorry Mar. Life is hard. So... I am gonna put Neko up against another kickass chick. That's right, you heard me. This time it is the lovely Yuki from Asobi Seksu. Can Neko compete with this bilingual chick? Chiggas wanna know!

here's neko again...














here is yuki.

hmmmm....

I have an unknown alcoholic beverage in my hand, most likely known as a "panny dropper," there is a can of whip cream, Emilie is holding a jello shot, my boob is being grabbed by Lindsey who also holds a jello shot, and some dood in the back is probably thinking he's gonna get some. I am a little embarassed this was taken only two years ago... especially since it looks stangely like a room in a frat house...

it's 'bout time for picture day!

hot chicks.
on the left we have chiggalicious. she's a poop princess.
on the right is angela kay. definately a unicorn princess. i'm not sure about this unicorn business, but she has some big boobies.

care about a polar bear

A very controversial phrase these days seems to sound a little something like, “global warming.” Setting aside Gore’s film, and the fact that it is a scare tactic, the earth’s temperature is increasing. Period. I am not going to go into an entire argument about the effects of increasing temperatures on the globe, but by all means if you want to know, I’ll gladly provide you with my argument.

My reason for bringing it up is that it’s a sad day when I hear that polar bears are resorting to cannibalism.

Why, you ask?

Well, it appears as though their natural habitat is losing the normal temperature range for their food source to be available, and proper feeding and mating conditions, so they are munching on each other. In other words, the ice is melting. This will destroy the entire population structure of the species. Is a species going to opt for reproduction in the midst of hunger? Hell no. Adequate sustenance is required for the mother to risk the costs of reproduction.

While this may seem insignificant to your life, because hell, most people don’t give two shits about polar bears during the day, if this species fails to survive, what is the next to go? When does it get to a point where we lose the vegetation and bacteria we humans require for survival? Think about it... it isn’t an issue of hurricanes people. We essentially only care about ourselves, so maybe think about your future generations? Lose that out of sight out of mind attitude... that “not in my lifetime” complex. Maybe?

check it

dooooood. the world didn't end so check out my beer review on weathered. don't worry it sucks. weathered. like me

06.06.06

I am completely fed up with people thinking it is the "Devil's Day" and the world is going to end. Well guys, nothing has happened yet. THE WORLD IS NOT GOING TO END. I mean come on, 21 countries are holding a 24 hour prayer session today to ward off the Devil! That will protect us!

Completely ludricrous.

There have been threats of mass killings occuring at schools today though. If some little shits decide to go and shoot up people because it is 06.06.06, then I may just go seek them out and beat them with my billy club. Okay, I probably won't, but what goes through their minds to think this is funny? They are wasting peoples' time having to be on edge all day securing schools because some dumb kids think it is cool to post threats all over the internet. Things have gotten way out of hand. Chiggers ain't happy.

shitty vans

I have always been an avid hater of those mini van things. They fly down the interstate like space shuttles and plow you over. But who’s to blame? It is probably full of annoying, screaming children that mini van mom or dad wants to murder. In the words of my meat-head friend driving in traffic, “Fuck you mini van! I’ll chop off your balls!”
Well, I believe Chris Krok WSB radio has shed some light on the situation. He just got a mini van and swore that he would kill himself before he got one, and would want the gas guzzling SUV instead. But, there is apparently a perk to these shitty vans. In an SUV you cannot reach back to beat your screaming children easily. In a mini van you can basically walk back there and strangle them yourselves! How amazing is this!? Plus, there are like four cup holders! Shiiiiiiit, if mini vans mean beating kids when they act like crap, well I have just become a supporter of the mini van.
On the other hand, if another one rides my ass for 10 miles in horrendous traffic I will pull out my shot gun, cause that’s what a redneck would do.

ooo. la. la.

Many of you may not be aware of this, but I used to be a supermodel before I got into poop. I was a little shorter than what they preferred, but hell Kate Moss did it!? Here's one of the fabulous pictures that went around the world. I made like 50 bucks! Now the guy that modeled with me, who went by the name of "Phil" well, lets just say EVERYONE knows him now. He is a model turned musician, and his hit "Super Robot Monkey Team Hyper Force Go" is played like all the time.