Thursday, April 27, 2006


I feel the need for this picture to be shared with the world. I just stumbled upon it recently on Yelena's (sunshine and rope swings) myspace. We were at My Sister's Room, the lesbian bar in Decatur. I didn't know I drank PBR there... but I guess this makes sense considering one of my eyes is almost shut and I have a big smile on m face. Try and close one eye with a big smile when you are sober and look natural. It is harder than it seems...

Monday, April 24, 2006

monday supports chiggers' narcissism.

there was some intruiging juice in the styrofoam cup.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

pure preciousness...

Ever gone to the cuteness overlaod site for a little pick me up? Well, I am certainly lame enough to do so. Since I am sure many of you males feel that such an internet adventure would be considered "gay," I bring to you cuteness overload, free of charge. Hahahahahaha....

Awwwww! Look at the little faces!

Now, doesn't he look sleepy!?

There are just not words for this...

I saved the most precious one for last!

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

is chiggers being stalked?

Last night, feeling low and drinking crappy wine, I decided to head to the Java Monkey to do some research and drink good beers. Perfect.

“Highland Oatmeal Porter, please.”

*gulp gulp gulp

I move toward the beer cooler to check out my next beer. Before I could decide this random dood hands me another Highland.

“Uhhhh... thanks?”

What the hell?

“What’s this for?” I ask.

“Oh we’ve talked before, and I saw you drinking that beer so I got you another one.”

“Oh... where? Here?”

“Yea, I was sitting next to you once and you were playing your music aloud, and asked me if it was okay.”

“Oh yea!” (I really had to recollection.)

“Have time to chat?”

“Ugh... ugh...yea, I guess...”

Dammit chiggers.

He sits down at my table.

Don’t get me wrong here, he seems like a nice guy, a little old, hell I’ll chit chat with the poor guy who took the liberty of ordering me a beer.

He starts to talk.

“So I’ve seen you in here a few times with some guy. Didn’t know where you were together or not.”

I should have just taken this as a way out, but being bummed and after the wine (truth serum), I screwed myself.

“Yea... well... we aren’t together anymore.”

Chiggers! What the hell!? This guy has essentially been watching you and you didn’t pull the boyfriend card!?”
“How old was that guy?”


“Guess how old I am.”

“I don’t really know.” *getting a little ticked off



I see my friend walk in so I take advantage of standing in the long line with him to get another beer. I have to get my tab over $5 to use a card there. Dammit. I tell him the strange situation I am in.

It takes quite some time to order, but the dood is still sitting at my table. Doesn’t get the ignore message.

I suck down my beer as fast as possible so I can get the hell out of my favorite coffee shop/bar/study place.

As he rambles on about whatever I notice he doesn’t look me in the eye. He is one of those who seems like they are, but doesn’t actually look directly... Creepier...

Then he does it...

“I am going to go out on a limb here. Would like to go out with my cousin and I this weekend?”

“I can’t (*smiling) I have a performance.”


I pack up my things.

“Wait before you go, can I get your number?”

I had full intentions of being polite and giving him a fake number.

“Okay. It’s 404...”

Then I slipped because I got nervous about lying. Crap. I just gave him my actual number.

“Oh wait, call me so I have yours, I don’t like answering strange numbers.”

Saved again. He went down in my phone as “his name here - don’t answer!” Plus, I can always change my number.

Am I wrong? Is this not creepy? I realize I dug my own grave on this one, but still, isn’t it a little weird? I now do not want to go there without a guy friend to scare doods like this one off. I am obviously too friendly and cannot make up lies.

har har har

Professor: "War, what is it good for?"

Class: *giggles*

Professor: "Okay okay, so what, what is it good for?"

Chiggers: "Absolutely nothing."

One person in the class + chiggers: *laughing histerically and turning red*

Damn people. They can't even laugh at a dumb joke.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

"marriage is for white people"

Yes, this was the title of an article in the Atlanta Journal Constitution on Sunday. And well no, I do not find it to be a well-written article. I apologize to the writer, Joy Jones, but I feel your writing style is rather elementary. The concept was rather intruiging, it grabbed my attention, but oh wait, the facts and writing were not as intersting as the title.

Divorce has become somewhat of an epidemic. We are all well aware of this. She actually made the point that "As men mature they begin to recognize the benefits of having as roost and roots, the are more willing to settle down. By this time, however, many of their female peers are satisfied with the lives they have constructed..." Joy Jones is referring to black women, if you couldn't tell from the "marriage is for white people" thing. (Of course, there are only two types of people in America: black and white.) Statistics show that 43.3% of black men and 41.9% black women haven't ever married, while the numbers show only 27.4% of white men and 20.7% of white women. This is a significant difference, but can she really be allowed to make the point that "marriage is for white people?" Have you studied logical arguments ever? Does this not beg the question?

She attempts to justify this with her own experience, which I find to be a huge flaw in this type of article. She does not make her point gradually throughout her personal endeavors, but instead breaks to allow for the missing information. Smooth transitions Joy, smooth.

It rather difficult for me to swallow the fact that many Atlantans read this and felt enlightened. Where have all the good writiers gone to? Why do I have to search the internet endlessly to find them? Why can't I pick up Atlanta's Sunday's paper and be fulfilled?

Monday, April 17, 2006

and that's happy monday to you good sir.

transgressing the norm. using all the particles in the universe.

beer of the week: hacker weisse

So there I was balls deep in this girls ass... oh wait, wrong story...

I shall begin again.

So there I was on Easter Sunday, sitting all alone in the Taco Mac, attempting to extend my pity party through the next twenty-four hours. Easter is my favorite holiday, because everyone knows I AM the Easter Bunny. But wait, that’s another story too.

It’s a gorgeous day and my hangover cannot handle the dark beers, so of course I am going for the hefeweissens. I tell my server to get whatever I have not had before, because they all seem to taste the same. She does a stupendous job of bringing me some nice cold ones, and then it happened... a pint of Hacker-Pschorr Weisse was placed upon the table.

I took a sip, and I said to myself, this is the beer of the week. The Hacker Weisse is not your ordinary hefe. It has something more... a little something I cannot pinpoint, but chiggers approves.

A crisp citrus aroma, a hazy marigold-like coloring, and a flavor that kicks the wheat beer flavor up a notch or two.

And, as any other beer I would recommend, deeeelicious.

I know you feel like you just wasted your time reading this, cause damn when i re-read it, it was pretty boring. Cheers!

Saturday, April 15, 2006

that's right folks, it's cheese. bigger than your head. heh heh, i said head.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

What is going on? A 15 year old gets an incident report from her school because she has an American flag in her back pocket? Since when weren't Americans allowed to display a little sense of nationalism? Damn, many countries don't even feel comfortable waving their flag, we should be glad we can purchase the obnoxious American flag items that are out there.

High schools and middle schools were closed for two days because this incident has caused such a ruckus. Unacceptable. Forsaking education (which, by the way is getting worse by the day here) because kids are upset over not being able to wave an American flag at school? These kids shouldn't even need a reason to be angered by this. I smell communism.... (well, that is a little extreme, but you get the picture.)

Monday, April 10, 2006

picture day!

Yeah, yeah. You heard me. It wasn't jesus.

harpoon esb - trackside's finest

Folks, the time has come to change it up a bit... step aside from those porters and stouts. How about a good ol’ drinking beer? What about the best drinking beer at my favorite bar? What about one that only costs a mere dollar more than the classic PBR pub can? Yes. Harpoon ESB. The amounts of this beer I have ingested probably
borders on insane. But, hell, I love Trackside, and I love beer. This ESB never fails to be tasty, even at 4 o’clock in the AM.

ESB means English Style Bitter, and I will chop off your balls if you try to argue with this. Typically I associate bitter with hops. Well, the Harpoon may be the exception to the rule. It has this crisp bitterness without an overabundance of hops. I couldn’t imagine anything better for a drinking beer. You get flavor, and don’t have to switch to a watery lager. Excellent.

I often describe beers as having an amber color, and go into way too much detail about the stratification in the coloring. This is not necessary for this ESB, it is amber through and through... underneath to Trackside lights.

It really has no smell beyond the smell of the pint glass. Another perk for a drinking beer.

Not overwhelming. Simply delicious. Grab one of these before you order that Bud Light.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

the poor unfortunate american $1

Listen up gung-ho Americans who actually support the billions of dollars we put into our military. (And no, this is not directed at Republicans.) The EU is taking over in sly ways and the eruo is kicking the dollars' ass. Chiggers isn't really happy. I like Europe, and I like the dumbass American tourists over there snapping pictures, sporting Disneyland sweatshirts and fannypacks, and pissing the French off. But this is besides the point. Everything now considered to be "American" like Dunkin' Donuts, Dr. Pepper, and Slim Fast are owned by Europe. In fact, it would take days to list all the brands and corporations which are European owned.

When did all of this happen, you may ask? Well, there is no difinitive answer here, but ever since those countries, (mostly the big 12) got together and formed that thing called the "European Union" and their economy became more powerful than both the United States and Japan by invensting in American businesses, Europe somehow snuck to the top. Americans had no reaction to anything going on. Well, because most Americans had no idea, and the big wigs had no choice, as they suddenly ran into antitrust policies, and that socialism stuff which occurs over there across the Atlantic.

Well listen here Europe, your socialist and communist notions may be great for you, but over here bigger is better. Sure, I would love an egalitarian social system, but I don't want my paycheck deprived. You may rely on NATO, (haha, that is actually still around) but I don't trust the rest of the world to not attack us, so I support the military. Now that isn't feasible with your type of social system is it? You can't fork our that kind of cash, can you?

Moving on...

Americans like Europe more than Europe likes America. It's true, look at the Gallop poll. Are we just that nice, or is Europe still a little jealous that we were more powerful than them for so long and drive bigger cars and our gas prices are lower and we aren't jam-packed into countries smaller than Texas? Well, I'm not sure, but they have television shows directed at making fun of Americans. They picture us as rednecks living in trailors drinking Bud Light. The even have "Jerry Springer: The Opera." We don't do that with Europe. We don't care, we have better things to do. We actually work. None of these vacances for 4 weeks to Club Med.

Now, I know I haven't nearly covered all of it, but whatever. I don't want to put down the Europeans too much, but I do want to defend that fact that our culture does not work well with every European ideal, and reforms and issues which need to made and/or dealt with in the States (like HEALTH CARE and SUE-HAPPY FOLKS) do not have to be a mirror image of Europe. Now where is all of this hostility coming from?

Well, it is in response to T.R. Reid's The United States of Europe, which is a brilliant read. He targets an American audience and lays out the facts of the EU's power over the United Sates rather humorously. He is an American, however, he sides with Europe. (I think he actually moved to London. Traitor.) He makes a point to demonstrate how much better Europe is than the United States, but fails to recognize the differences. In fact, if the reader doesn't recognize such flaw, they make take this book to heart. I do think that Americans should read this; it is loaded with facts about Europe's power, and where it lies. We need know Europe's potential so it doesn't bite us in the ass later. BUT, keep in mind, what Reid thinks is better need not be an for the U.S.

Reid, T.R. The United Sates of Europe. New York: Penguin Books, 2004.

Monday, April 03, 2006

monday is picture day. why? i don't really know.

was chiggers too drunk or was her tongue all tuckered out?